If your former partner won't engage with mediation, the process does not stop there. Here is what actually happens next.
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When a former partner will not take part in family dispute resolution (FDR), the process does not simply grind to a halt. An accredited FDR practitioner is required to make genuine attempts to bring the other party in, and if those attempts fail, they can issue a certificate that allows the parent who wants to resolve things to apply to court. Refusal closes one door. It does not close every door.
Before anyone can be certified as having failed to attend, the FDR practitioner must make a real effort to bring them into the process. In practice, this means making genuine attempts to reach the reluctant parent, usually more than once, offering a reasonable choice of days and times, and telling them plainly what happens if they still do not engage. This is not a box-ticking exercise. It exists so that a parent who is simply hard to reach, rather than genuinely unwilling, still gets a fair chance to take part.
If the other parent still will not attend after those attempts, the practitioner can issue what is known as a section 60I certificate in the failure to attend category. This certificate does not judge who is right or wrong in the dispute. Its only purpose is to allow the parent who wants to resolve things to file an application in the Federal Circuit and Family Court, because in most parenting matters the court will not hear a case unless a genuine attempt at FDR has been made first. The certificate cannot be used as evidence of anything in the dispute itself, but a court may take a person's refusal into account, including when considering whether to order costs against them later.
A flat refusal can feel like a wall, but it is worth pausing on what might sit behind it. Some parents refuse because they are angry or avoidant. Others refuse because of genuine financial pressure, confusion about the process, or, in some cases, safety concerns that make a joint session feel unsafe. A good FDR practitioner will factor this in. If cost seems to be the barrier, a referral to a government-funded service may be more appropriate than pushing ahead. If safety is the concern, the practitioner may decide FDR is not appropriate at all for now, which leads to a different type of certificate rather than a failure to attend one.
If you have made yourself available and the other parent has not, you are not stuck. Once a certificate is issued, you can take that document to the court as part of an application for parenting orders. Many parents in this position also use the time to get clear legal advice about what a court application actually involves, since the certificate is a procedural key, not a legal opinion on your case. It is also worth knowing that a refusal now does not permanently rule mediation out. If circumstances change, including a shift in the other parent's willingness or a change of practitioner, FDR can be attempted again.
It is not unusual for both parents to end up with certificates against each other, particularly in more conflicted separations. One parent might be issued a certificate because the other refused to attend a first attempt, and the second parent might then initiate their own FDR process elsewhere, which the first parent then declines. Courts are used to seeing this pattern and will look at the individual circumstances rather than treating either certificate as decisive.
A refusal from the other parent is frustrating, and it can feel like the whole process was pointless before it even started. In practice, it usually means moving to the next step rather than starting again. A confidential enquiry with Alternative Mediations can help you understand where you stand, whether another attempt at FDR makes sense, and what a certificate would mean for your situation, with no pressure and no obligation.
Mediation is not a substitute for legal advice, and Alternative Mediations does not provide legal advice. If you are weighing up a court application, a family lawyer can explain what your certificate means for your specific circumstances.
An accredited FDR practitioner is required to give the other parent a genuine opportunity to take part, which usually means more than one attempt to make contact. If they still will not attend, the practitioner can issue a certificate that lets you apply to court without them having taken part.
You generally need a certificate from an accredited FDR practitioner before the court will hear most parenting applications. Once that certificate is issued because the other parent refused to attend, you can use it to file your application.
Not necessarily. The certificate simply records that they did not attend after being given a genuine opportunity to. Courts may consider a pattern of refusal when weighing costs, but the certificate itself is not a finding against anyone.
The certificate does not usually include reasons, only the category of outcome. If the reasons matter to your case, that is generally something to raise separately, often with legal advice.
Yes. A refusal at one point in time does not rule out FDR later. Circumstances change, and a fresh attempt, sometimes with a different practitioner, can still lead to a resolved outcome without court.
Alternative Mediations provides Family & Separation mediation across Australia, in person or online. Initial enquiries are confidential and obligation-free.
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